The Wonderful Helper Monkey Transvestite

I have many ideas shot down before they see life. At lunch, I test these ideas on the crew at AdamsMorioka. And, I'm usually met with looks of terror or pity. I want to open a bar for alcoholics. The idea is that complete sobriety is harsh, so moderation is a better idea. My bar would serve you, as an alcoholic, up to 10 cocktails. But they would be watered down and weak. This would save me money on liquor, and keep a guest from getting so drunk that they throw up on the street. Noreen says that I do not understand addiction and should stay away from this idea.

I also thought it would be fun to have a helper monkey. Why should they only be available to disabled people? If you had a helper monkey, it would get you a beer, or make your bed, or wake you up after you pass out on the floor. This idea slowly morphed into the idea of a helper transvestite. Someone didn't hear me correctly, and thought I said "helper tranny" not helper monkey. I like this idea even better. It might be odd to have someone dressed in extreme drag fetching beers and making the bed. But it would be fun and certainly dramatic. And when guests visit, wouldn't it be fantastic to be able to shout, "Miss Demeanor, where is the soup course? We are tired of waiting."

As you can see, unfortunately, my helper monkey/tranny idea has been appropriated by the Japanese. I blame Noreen, who, no doubt, immediately phoned friends in Tokyo and told them my bold and wonderful idea.